To My Dearest Husband

Hello and happy March! This week is my husbands birthday and it is also our 6 year wedding anniversary. I wanted to dedicate this post to him, because this man deserves recognition. WARNING: things are about to get mushy.


My Sweet Husband –

I don’t know where I am supposed to begin. Ten years ago at the age of 18 I had no idea you would become my husband. I also had no idea what life had in store for us. I know I couldn’t entirely help it but I want to say that I am sorry. I am sorry you had to watch me go through my lowest point in life. I am sorry that you had to talk me out of suicide  more than one time. I am sorry that you felt helpless. I am sorry that you had to watch me cry uncontrollably day after day. I am sorry for so many things. But I am also grateful.

I am grateful that you had to watch me go through my lowest point in life. I can always count on you making me feel better. You know, you don’t even have to say anything to me because being in your presence alone automatically makes me feel better.

I am grateful that you talked me out of suicide more than one time. If you didn’t, would I be here? No. You truly have saved me so many times and I don’t know how I am supposed to repay you for that.

I am grateful that you had to watch me cry uncontrollably day after day. I know it hurt you, so f***king much. But you stayed strong for me and sometimes I couldn’t wait to get to you and be in your arms, just to cry. For some reason, it made things better.

I love our love. I love our inside jokes, our made up languages, and our songs about the cat. I love that you run around the car to get to my door first to open it for me. I love that you play charades with me while you have mouthwash in and your trying not to spit it out from laughing. I love that you randomly dance with me. I love (even though at the time it pisses me off) that you look up and down the aisle to look for people, then quickly grab my butt in the grocery store. There are so many reasons why I love our love, those are just a few of my favorite ones!

I know you are going through your own struggles right now. I know you know this but I am here for you. I always will be. I know our marriage hasn’t been perfect. Um because there is no such thing as a perfect marriage. But it has been pretty damn awesome and I can’t wait to spend forever with you. You have brought so much joy to my life. No one can make me laugh as hard as you do. I mean, I seriously almost die every time you make me laugh, because A) I can’t breathe or B) I start hacking up a lung. You are truly my everything and I love you so very much. Happy 29th Birthday on Wednesday and 6 year wedding anniversary on Saturday. I can’t wait to celebrate.

“You are the source of my joy, the center of my world and the whole of my heart.” – Unknown

xo -court

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